Newsweek Exclusive Feature
January brings with it the rigorous and relentless goal setting for what should be achieved in the coming months—and piles on the pressure, through vision boards and gym subscriptions, to get there.
Although reported rates of burnout peaked in 2023 amid busy schedules and demanding work days, goal setting for many people still involves a complex and stressful set of career targets and personal or financial milestones.
In the spirit of the ever-popular "ins" and "outs"—short, sharable lists posted on social media for accountability—Newsweek consulted a group of psychological experts, counselors, and life coaches to learn how people can really prioritize wellness, rest, and self-care in 2024 to ultimately have their calmest year yet.
Out: Alcohol, Toxic Relationships, Screen Time
Marissa Alert, a licensed clinical health psychologist and consultant based in Boston, recommends people get to grips with what's caused them particular stress and worry in the past, and remove these things from the forefront of their lives.
"Identify areas where you feel stressed or overwhelmed. Once you figure that out, come up with realistic and proactive steps to address those stressors," Alert, the founder of MDA Wellness, told Newsweek.
"This might come in the form of delegating tasks, setting boundaries, and getting emotional support from someone you trust," she added.
Licensed clinical social worker and psychotherapist Toni Teixeira seconds this, telling Newsweek that those keen to feel calmer in 2024 need to ask themselves: "What's really getting in the way?"
"People really need to work on a mindset that values putting themselves first. If you're constantly telling yourself that you don't deserve to take time to relax, then any activity you might do to slow down might actually feel more stressful," Teixeira said.
Teixeira, who specializes in treating patients with anxiety and depression, suggests picking an activity like journaling, or working with a therapist, to better understand your personal obstacles. Ridding yourself of what no longer serves you can extend to your physical health and social life, too.
Clinically licensed social worker Chrissy Janiga recommends that people cut down on their alcohol consumption. She cites bidding farewell to alcohol, which some people trial in "Dry January," as being a "top way to feel calm" because of alcohol's effect on the body and, as a result, stress.
"Alcohol increases cortisol, is a depressant, and increases anxiety. You can remove the artificial chemicals produced by alcohol and work on how to properly cope with stress. Society reinforces that you need alcohol to relax but it actually increases stress and destroys the REM sleep we need," Janiga told Newsweek.
Alert, Teixeira and Janiga all agree it's a good time to toss out toxic relationships. They encourage their clients to evaluate their relationships with people who stunt their growth or indulge in negative behaviors.
A healthy and balanced diet is championed too, which would involve saying goodbye to excessive portions of processed food.
Angela Christian, a life coach who left behind a high-pressure Silicon Valley career, told Newsweek that people should steer clear of triggering digital content and excessive social media consumption.
"Your unconscious mind doesn't know the difference between what you're watching on television and real life which can trigger a stress response," she explained.
In: Meditation, Worry Time, Facing Uncertainty
The importance of prioritizing your mental health is well known, but how can we actually make sure we achieve it? Aine Rock, a life coach with a passion for holistic wellbeing practices, promotes the practice of mindfulness through meditation and yoga. She offers her clients mindset coaching, with mindfulness and breathwork support.
"When I coach people on tranquility for the coming year, I recommend a few key strategies including mindfulness practices and general self-care," Rock told Newsweek. "Mindfulness is the art of embracing the present moment fully through meditation, yoga or deep breathing exercises to reduce stress."
"In terms of self-care, I recommend prioritizing sleep, healthy food, exercise and enjoyment," she said. Mindfulness meditation can be an effective way to combat both stress and overwhelm, and can help people feel more in tune with themselves. While the conscious controlling of breathing can calm a person's emotional state.
Carving out small slots for worrying in a day is a technique championed by psychologist Alert. "If you're spending hours worrying, try to set aside 'worry time' where you dedicate 15 minutes to worrying. This will help you limit the time you spend worrying and allow you to come up with an action plan to deal with your concerns," she explained.
Alert advises her clients to "practice gratitude" and engage in "calming activities" to fine tune their thoughts into more positive patterns. This way, outside of "worry time" they're feeling balanced.
Adopting a more positive outlook on life can help make tackling its challenges less daunting and ultimately manifest a calmer one. Alert shared her advice on how to actually do this.
"Start by writing your values and thinking about how to live more in line with them. Think about your hobbies, activities, and work. When you have a strong sense of purpose and know your values, you tend to be more resilient when dealing with challenges," she explained.
Licensed counselor and mental fitness strategist Alicia Caldwell agrees with Alert. She told Newsweek that a surefire way to feel calmer in the long run is by improving your response to the least appealing sides of life, challenges and uncertainty.
"Responding to uncertainty can cause plenty of unease. Toss in a flexible mindset, recognizing that change is like unexpected scenery that adds richness and depth to your experiences," Caldwell, who has 19 years of experience in counseling, said.
"Instead of resisting change, anticipate detours as you learn to grow. When setbacks happen, try to see them as valuable lessons," she added.
The Classics: Sleep, Breathing, Exercise
The experts Newsweek spoke to say that the advice to tackle stress with physical activities and get those endorphins pumping is, while old, still valid.
"Embrace movement by doing activities that you enjoy, and that leaves you feeling energized and keen to work out consistently. When you're active, you can lower your stress levels and feel less anxious," Alert said.
The clinical health psychologist recommends incorporating a variety of mood-boosting and calming activities into your daily life. She puts forward anything from walking in nature to dancing or practicing yoga in the comfort of your own home.
"Try to schedule at least 15-minute periods throughout the day to engage in exciting or calming activities that are less strenuous, too. This could include watching funny videos, enjoying a cup of tea in silence, or listening to music. Or you can do nothing at all. These deliberate breaks throughout the day allow you to recharge, provide chances for relaxation, and can lower stress levels," she said.
Social worker and psychotherapist Teixeira suggests trying out breathing exercises geared at calming the nervous system for "automatic" tranquility. She told Newsweek that her work with clients centers around "slowly rewiring their nervous system."
"One activity that can produce a lot of calm in the body is three-to-five breathing, which is inhaling for a count of three and exhaling for a count of five," she said, adding that "this particular ratio activates the parasympathetic nervous system a little longer, that is the exhale."
The parasympathetic nervous system is the part of the nervous system which manages rest and relaxation.
Three-To-Five Breathing:
1. Inhale for a count of three.
2. Exhale for a count of five.
3. Repeat at least 3 times.
If you find it difficult to bring calm from breathing or meditation, you could always try to crack a laugh. Licensed counselor Caldwell argues that a simple laugh is a "mood booster" and "peace inducer" like no other. Sticking on your favorite comedy series or catching up with good friends could do the trick.
Holistic life coach Rock told Newsweek that prioritizing your quality of sleep shouldn't get buried under other nuggets of advice. "It's an important way to nourish your body, mind and spirit," she said.
She added that people should embrace saying "no" and setting boundaries to "protect their time and wellbeing" when something that's likely to disrupt their peace pops up.
Alert suggests people "consider seeking help from psychologists or your physician" if they're still not feeling calm after trying out different methods.
Now, hopefully, you can try and bring more calm into your life this year—though don't pressure yourself by racing through the full "to-do" list—that kind of defeats the point, doesn't it?
READ THE FULL STORY HERE: https://www.newsweek.com/how-have-calmest-year-your-life-2024-1857256
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